Looking at Life like a Chagall painting

In the sugar-coated motion of everyday life,

The crystallized lips--they do not speak.

Passers-by look distorted through the looking glass.

A little like: Looking at Life like a Chagall painting.

Stripping life down to the mere basics,

Letting the old spirits float around you.

The sound of the rain hitting the window pane,

And the wind howling with the wish to enter.

Remind you how Life is in its actuality.

Ready to take you up on a moment's notice.

And not let go of you: Till the eyes are sunken,

And the smiles are gone, the bones jutting through.

Till the dreams die and the soul fades.

Life takes the twinkle of eyes and the dimples.

And promises nothing, but the precious gift of Death.

For Death is reality and Life a mere illusion,

However ghastly she may be!

Smoke

She looks on the passing traffic.
The whizz and the busy honking.
People in their normal pursuits,
Going noisily about their business.
She looked at the milieu,
With mildly curious eyes.
Drawing smoke into her lungs,
Closes her eyes against the sun.
Not feeling its warmth, nor the noise.
For one sublime moment...
As the smoke curls inside her.
She keeps her words locked inside,
Too precious to be shared...
Treasured inside, away from sight.

Hey stranger!
Wont you ask her what they are?

For some romances last...even after they are over.

I'm saying goodbye even before I say hello.

Every time I am just walking out the door,

When I haven't even tried turning the key.

For it is only in my loneliness do I find you.

It's in the whisper of time that I hear you.

Softly brushing against my skin in light teasing,

Of memories--dark and light, sad and pleasing.

So many sunsets, twilights and open endings.

Drinks that burned the back of my throat,

Cannot even compare with the unshed tears.

For I am loathe to part with them,

Now that they're all I have left of you.

A lifetime is too little time to get over you.

And the reason is simple, I just dont want to.

Hoping that if one day on passing each other by,

You'll find it in your heart to smile once before I die.

It is indeed so hard to die when there's beauty around.

Dark shadows cloud my eyes-what's lost is once again found.

Heartbreak Valentine

One minute of silence please.
For the death of my love.
One moment of silence please.
Need to pick up my heart from all over the floor.
One timeless moment of silence please.
Need to wish my tears away.
A minute of your time please.
Before this memory washes itself away.

Perdition

Inhibited Rage fills my mind..

My soul screams for perdition..

Words have stopped...

and I feel trapped..

God please please let me out

--Is all my mind screams.

But there is no divine revelation.

Only blank silences and monologues

With me as its only audience.

Gibberish words making sense to none

Headless images swirling but doesn't fix on one

Poetry has bid a bloody sweet kiss for a goodbye

And the finer emotions are singing their own lullaby

Life has become an euphemism for a senseless rout

As I try to recover from each nauseated bout

Whats wrong..Whats right..Am i going through puberty?

But thats a laughable option coz I'm twenty!

Blankness eats away at a part of my soul

Redemption would come only with something novel

A little piece of heaven is what everyone wants

I want the chaotic Pandemonium of Perdition

For there this rage would be released from its inhibition

And I would pass onto the hellish heaven of mine

My Immortal...

Once it was cold and lonely

I was feeling down and blue

You said to me “Hold on Tight!

I’m always going to be there for you.”

And you did, my immortal.

Forever and for always.

But the journey’s just begun.

The road ahead is long and drawn.

Everyone is searching for their immortals

Someone who’ll come and say: “I’m here.

Forever, trust me and have no fear.”

So what’s the hurry, life is long.

The journey is only lonely.

There’s only happiness on the other side,

Green meadows and rainbows and flowers.

They pale in comparison to the colors of love.

Life’s stones are easier to tread on.

As you know there’s someone who’s by your side.

So what’s the hurry? My little friend,

The journey has just begun.

Tarry awhile and see it shape up.

Nothing is easy, nothing is fun.

Just need to mix colors and the world’s just begun.

Walking through the woods...a ballad

Walking through the woods, holding hands.
Looking at the rainbows with its many colored bands.
Seeing such dreams that only lovers can see.
A future bright and sweet and a child running about in glee.
So many dreams about our home.
Where the heart rests after a long roam.
Walking through the woods and kissing lightly.
Making our way through life with a step sprightly.
As darkness descends we both get scared.
I try to hold onto your grasp but alas, despaired.
Shrubs so thick and mangly, deep is the bloody cut.
But they are nothing compared to the one in my heart.
I cant see you my love, I cant find you.
Im searching through the night dark and blue.
Where are you? My heart cries out.
But the resounding silence leaves me without a doubt.
You aint there.
You aint near anywhere.
I see the dawn breaking through the leaves.
And like the red drops my heart grieves.
Im searching for you, just answer me once.
I wont take much of your time, just kiss you once.
And then I see a sight that much joy to me brings.
Such that I skip and my heart begins to sing.
You are right there standing at the edge of the wood.
Waiting for me in the same spot as long as you could.
I wrap my fingers around you quick.
And my heart says good-bye to the fears so toxic.
I’d thought you say at the cross-roads “Goodbye my dear.
This is where our path ends I fear.
I go my own way, you go yours.
And forget the dreamy future years.”
I’ve got you close to my heart once again.
Thank you dear God for ridding me of my fiery pain.
Hold my hand and kiss me once.
Let me believe in my ballad’s joyance.

[This poems a love song based on a dream I had but am not very confident about the ending that I saw...]

this poem has no name

I spent so many days with you
By my side when we were just kids you know.
I would write your name on the board.
You'd smile,say this is the last time,please.
Floored by your smile I'd rub off the chalk.
But on my heart your smiled etched an indelible mark.
Getting into trouble on purpose so that you'd come to me.
From all your friends I'd like to snatch you away.
You meant much more to me than I meant to you.
I knew that,yet I didnt care.
Want to do the same even today.
But where are you?Have no trace.
And then I think whats the use of it all?
You'd never recognise me even if I do.
But I think I'll have a sense of deja vu.
Memories have to be sheltered now.
Life's nothing but a collection of stories.


This is dedicated to one of my childhood friends.
To you my "Gundader shordar"...from your "Ragu-buri"...love you lots and missing you too...would love to see you once again in my life.
Wait for me on the other side of the rainbow(n I'll be doing the same),have lots of stories to share.

TRAPPED

Trapped in this body I no longer want to stay.

Away from these physicalities, isn’t there any other way?

Where you walk but there are no footprints in the sand.

Where I can hold your soul without holding your hand.

I can then fly, go wherever I wanted ever to go.

Any faraway land, any imaginary shore.

All that the mind may have heard in poem and lore.

Where you wont be missed, you can be wherever you wanted to be.

You don’t feel helpless,

You don’t have to open your heart every time to show your true feelings.

For then it would be clear, all.

Where there is no ridicule after a fall.

Coz then everyone of us will fly.

Free from each other, and yet bound, we even don’t have to try.

Try to be perfect , try to be free.

Choose and decide, which is dearer to me.

And then prove my choice for everyone to see.

For the moment all alone is all I want to be.

Coz in the end, nothing matters.

What you do, what the world infers.

The soul is always here, aint it?

Then why don’t we all free it from the body in which it

Stays trapped……

To a place:

Where there is no love, no hate.

There are no feelings to be controlled by fate.

Where you are dead but yet not so.

Where you can just be, go with the flow.

Why hasn’t such a place been discovered as yet?

Or is it too expensive for it, to me, be let.

I want to break free, tear all these binds.

Kill these tears before my sight it blinds.

I don’t wanna stay trapped in this body anymore.

Any other place is better than this and that’s for sure.

The Eternal Optimist

My life has changed since the last time I wrote.
Yes,change it has,a lot of changes have been wrought.
But its time to change again.Just take a note:
Change is the constant,changes have to be brought.

Along the way I met a friend,he gave me hope.
O yes hope,what I was looking for,hope!!
Hope that I could be myself once more,to be the real person.
But had I forgotten my complicated self,the primary reason.

I am my fire,I am my enemy.
I cause destruction wherever I go.

No Don't touch me.You'll burn your hands.

But change I must and change I will.
Dejected soul,helpless pose.
It's gone,all gone,to where you ask?
To the darkened room,not out of my life.
'O I want colors of the rainbow in my life.

This loneliness is killing me.
But what use is pain to a dead man?
But it's time to change and change I must.
This time for the better,as it was for the first.
People come and people go,into my life and out of it.
It pretend it never hurts,my face all alit.
But this times its different,time for a change!

I'll walk down the sunny paths of life, once more.
For a short while,I promise myself,once more.
My head will be held high,as it always is.
But this time I'll try to feel it inside.
I'm a complicated person,a bundle of contradictions.
I'm looking for stablility, a real person.
I'm not perfect,nobody is.
But cant someone accept me as it is.
Someone who'll bring some tranquility into my life and way.
But when the time comes,I'll push him away.
Do you know why,of course you do....

I am my fire,I am my enemy.
I cause destruction wherever I go.

I dont write for no one,I write for myself.
So don't peep into my diary,it's meant for myself.
My fantasy,my imagination.
They are where I find my salvation.
My life is a story,it is fake.
I question myself at every step I take.
Every step I've taken has been for my dream's sake.
It's difficult to see your dreams turn into a nightmare.
Mocking you 'coz they'll never come true,o yeah!!

In the end I wish I could write about the others around.
War and peace,men and destruction in this world abound.
But in this web I'm always caught.
In it's threads Imm always fraught.
It's not that I dont try,try to come out.
But the moment I do,the screams shout.

It's killing me.
My loneliness is killing me....
But somewhere deep down I still believe....